Who Was I Kidding, Mexico?

Hi Mexico,

I wrote and told you that I wasn't coming, but I didn't tell you a couple weeks later when I was offered the chance to come down again. Why? Well, because all of a sudden I was uncertain. All of a sudden, I thought of a lot of other things I could be doing instead. All of a sudden, I wasn't so sure I needed you anymore.

But who was I kidding? I do need you, or someone like you. I need a place to go to recharge my batteries, and to remember those things that are really important to me and my life. For whatever reason, I have a hard time remembering these things when immersed in my life up here. Until I can learn how to incorporate how alive I feel when I'm with you into the life I have without you, I have to come back to you.

So, I'll be there sometime around the end of April. And guess what? I'm bringing a friend. She's amazing, and I'm sure you two will get along just fine. I just hope that you can offer her as much comfort and insight as you offered me.

Oh yeah, her name's Terri. :)

Love and spicy humid hot Mexican kisses
Morgan

Bad News, Mexico

Dearest Mexico,

I have some really bad news. For reasons totally within their rights that make complete sense, the people that I dogsat for in Mexico don’t need me this year. Despite the logic of their decision, I am heartbroken. Despite my heartbreak, I am now excited and curious about where I’ll end up instead.

I haven’t forgotten you, Mexico, and I may still end up lost in your huge expanse of spicy foods and welcoming people. I can’t help but wonder, however, if this change in plans was meant to be a shove to push me in another direction, one I haven’t yet determined.

Immediately upon hearing the news – curse those smart phones and their instant email updates! – I became morose and self-pitying. Well, now I would simply have to move, and settle into a more regular routine, and punish those around me for the fact that I couldn’t leave. Of course I knew that this attitude wouldn’t last, and that my life is NOT that bad simply because I have lost my trip to Mexico, but sometimes you just have to let the emotion wear itself out or it will start to eat at you.

My mother was not impressed. “You’ll find something else; you always do.”
She’s right; I do always find something else, because when you’re looking for opportunities, they’re always there. It is simply time for me to look for a new one.

I’m sorry, Mexico. I told you before that I couldn’t guarantee my fidelity, and it looks like fate might be pulling us apart. You see, I wanted to come back to you, but now that I’m going to be left more to my own devices – and more dependent on my own savings – I am very likely to pick somewhere else that I haven’t seen to see if the sparks fly. I can’t tell you what will happen, because I honestly don’t know, but I do know this: future memories cannot replace the wonderful things I have already experienced. I will never forget you, and I'm sure I'll see you again soon.

Love and new adventure kisses
Morgan